tastefullyoffensive:

"Don’t worry human, I will tunnel us to safety!" [x]


"Wow, what a butthole."
— Either a compliment or an insult depending on the situation (via nessainky)

brookeeverdeen:

"hey do you want to hang out tonight?"

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"we’ll have food"

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A study has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his chest while he is on fire. No further studies are expected on this subject.

the-fault-in-our-wifi:

steampunkwyn:

1000% of women agree.

I am woman and I can confirm this


jessajohansson:

so when ned and catelyn were reunited after robert’s rebellion she was like “i have a surprise for you… it’s a baby!” and ned pulled jon out and was like “no way! me too! crazy right”


Give him a puzzle and watch him dance.


judgebunnie:

undereyelids:

Bruce Willis is probably going to keep making action movies because you know what they say about old habits

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hoechlined:

Tyler Hoechlin being super adorable (✿◠‿◠)


clungetastic:

my drug dealer cracks me up

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fullmetalfisting:

fullmetalfisting:

I had a really small period and I was like “maybe I just miscarried a tiny fetus” and then I realized I haven’t had sex since Columbus landed in the Americas 

I realize this sounds like I fucked Columbus. I want to clarify. Just so there’s no confusion, I did. I did fuck Columbus.


kkristoff:

melodyminnie:

Looks like Hans has been making sandwiches.

guess he’s finishing other people’s sandwiches now

kkristoff:

melodyminnie:

Looks like Hans has been making sandwiches.

guess he’s finishing other people’s sandwiches now